I’m So Happy I Started My Blog

Date: August 8, 2016

Author: astottler

Hello! I’m supposed to be working on my vet school apps (story of my life right now), but the kitty in my lap is making things difficult.

I’m not sure why I thought blogging would be any easier?

Vet school apps have me doing a lot of reflecting. I’ve changed so much in the past 4 years, and it’s really hard for me to remember who I was back then and what I was like. Having my blog is invaluable. I’m so glad I started it during my freshman year. It’s taken me all the way through college, through so many changes. It’s just incredible to have all that documented. Plus, having my original thoughts on why I wanted to go into veterinary medicine, in real time, is super helpful as I write my essay. With new experiences, things change, and it’s really nice to be able to go back to my roots. I also feel like when I’m blogging, my posts are more raw and authentic than when I’m actually writing. My essay was feeling really stiff, so I sat down, in wordpress, and typed up a blog post reflected on my vet experiences. I can’t post it for privacy reasons, but it was a great exercise.

In a similar vein, I discovered a whole bunch of pictures from high school and middle school that I’ve never seen before. I thought my most awkward years were undocumented. That is not the case. Why did I think bright yellow sweatpants were a thing??

Actually, going through the old pictures was super interesting, and I think there needs to be a post about all that at some point. And don’t worry, some embarrassing pictures will be included.

I found one picture from 2011 that I feel like perfectly sums up who I was then.

Softball glove. Cat. That’s all ya need.

Last night, we made my fig and goat cheese salad, with the fig bounty from the farmer’s market.

This morning I went to Crossfit. It was hard. I took one look at the workout and knew it would be a rough one. For the strength, we worked on cleans. I worked up to 110#, which is not close to my 1 rep max, but the heaviest I’ve gone since my foot injury, and all felt good!

The WOD:

30-20-10

thrusters (55#)

pull ups

Here’s the thing. In the past month, I’ve stopped using a band for pull ups, and have been kipping. But everything has been in smaller sets. I honestly wasn’t sure I was going to be able to do a set of 30. (This is of course with breaks in between some of the reps, but it’s not the same as a full recovery). I didn’t even get a band out because I figured I would dive in and not give myself a way out. And here’s the thing. Thrusters make anything after thrusters feel way harder. I broke my first set of thrusters into 15 and 15 to avoid burning out right away, and then attacked the pull ups in 5s, so doing 5 and then coming off the bar, and coating myself with chalk. Honestly, I think grip strength was a major factor here too. But I got through the set of 30. Then 20. Then 10. I finished as a chalk monster with jelly arms, but accomplished! Seriously, chalk on my forehead, chalk in my hair, chalk on my shins. I though it was going to take me forever, but somehow it was only 13ish minutes? I don’t think I’ve ever done that many non-banded pull ups! While having a stress fracture stunk, there is always a silver lining. I could not have done this a few months ago. Even when things get rough, you have to look for the positives, and hold on to what you do have!

Post workout breakfast was my current go-to. Plain Greek yogurt with sunbutter, cinnamon KIND granola, and a peach.

I spent the rest of the morning working on my app, and then made the same fig and goat cheese salad for lunch. Real talk: 2/3 of the figs didn’t make it into the bowl. I love figs.

Also-Something kind of fun. We tried grilling watermelon last night! I still don’t know what I think. We have a charcoal grill, so it was a really smoky flavor. I made a mint/honey glaze for it. The watermelon felt like it should be savory. I think I liked it best with a little salt, a tiny bit of glaze, and goat cheese.

Have you ever grilled watermelon?

Is This Adulting?

Date: February 29, 2016

Author: astottler

Categories: Uncategorized

I wasn’t actually planning on posting today because I have a big test tonight and lots and lots of school work (yay), but I happened to come across a post I wrote almost exactly 2 years ago. (For the record, I swear I don’t spend my time reading my own archives.)

Here’s the post.

My first thought upon reading it was, “Wow, look how far I’ve come.”

At that point in my life, I was quite a mess. No getting around it. My classes were crazy stressful and I was struggling in them, and I had the added pressure of uncertainty with what I wanted to do with my life. Also, around that time I had recently finished my 100% whole foods challenge, and that messed with my head quite a bit. Post-challenge, my eating habits were erratic and as a result I was pretty anxious.

Now, I feel like I have things mostly figured out. I’m enjoying my classes, studying hard, and doing pretty well. I figured out what study methods work best for me. I’m working ahead on all my assignments so everything is pretty low stress.

2 years ago Aurora. How did my hair look that good?? Also how is that dorm lighting decent?

I know what I want to do with my life now. And I’ve taken steps to get there. I have a plan. Well, for the most part.

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I work some. I teach spin. I am comfortable with who I am, and I understand who I am. I mean, as well as a 21 year old is capable of doing.

And finally, my eating habits are better and more stable than they’ve ever been. Granted, my stomach issues kind of force that. But I finally feel like I’ve figuring things out. In a few weeks, I intend to do a whole post on this, but I’ve been feeling good. I’m happy.

Multiple times lately, I’ve stopped myself and thought “life is really good right now.”

I’m trying to get excited for my next chapter, but I’m also not ready for the end of this life. I’m trying to soak up every moment of my last year. How did this happen??

I guess college really is a time for growth, and I’m so happy I’ve been able to document that on my blog. It’s little moments like this that make us realize how much we change, often for the better.

1 Day Until My Blogiversary!

Date: December 8, 2015

Author: astottler

Categories: Uncategorized

Once, again, we are approaching my Blogiversary. 3 years…how did 3 years pass so quickly? I know I haven’t been posting as much as I would like lately but it’s finals week so it is what it is! Today I thought I’d throw it back and repost my blogiversary post from 2 years ago in preparation. It’s interesting to see how much as changes even since then! Expect an ACTUAL blogiversary post on Wednesday though! For more 12 days of Christmas, check out the tab!

12 Things That Have Changed in the Last Year

Today is the last day of Christmas! You know what that means? It’s officially my blogiversary! Yay! I hope you guys have liked these last 12 days of posting. I certainly have had a ton of fun writing them. And forcing myself to be creative in the kitchen-it’s been way too long since I spent any time there!

I want to use this last day to reflect on the past year. I feel like so much has changed, but I think it’s all for the better. If you’re curious, here’s my first post. It’s not as embarrassing as I was expecting. My next few those? Yeesh. (Why would I name a post 1,2,3, Testing?) Also, can we take a minute to talk about how my writing voice has changed? For some reason last spring quarter I was so sarcastic. Not that I’m not now, but I feel like every word was dripping with it. Interesting….Also-check out this food picture from one of my first posts…work of art right there folks.

So without further ado-12 things that have changed in the past year.

1. I quit rowing. To put it quit frankly, I was drowning. Fall quarter, it was such an awesome experience. To this day I miss the girls on my team. Winter quarter we moved in with varsity, and I just didn’t love it anymore. Plus, the time commitment increased-it was about 5 hours a day. I had a tougher class schedule, and was rapidly falling behind. Plus, after being one of the fastest over the fall, I just wasn’t improving and couldn’t keep up. This all took a huge toll on me-but that’s not (directly) why I quit. I was determined to finish the year with my commitment, or at least the quarter. My body had other plans though and I got a really bad case of mono (which actually changed my life a lot for many different reasons). Long story short-2 ER visits, crazy high fevers for WEEKS (101 on Advil and Tylenol), inability to get out of bed for 2-3 weeks, and ALL of Friends. Like, all 10 seasons. It was really awful and I had to go home-fun fact, while I had mono, I also caught the stomach flu, strep throat, and a week later, a cold and cough that developed into an ear and sinus infection. I think it’s fair to say that’s by far the sickest I’ve been in my life. At that point, it would be nearly impossible to gain my strength back in time for racing season, plus I took it all as a sign that what I was trying to do was just not sustainable for me. When I got back to school, I had such an amazing time because I actually had time for a social life, not to mention time to study (I know a lot of collegiate athletes do fine, but it just wasn’t working for me for a sport that I didn’t absolutely love.)

2. I ran 2 half marathons! I have entirely the blog world to thank for this. Before discovering this amazing community, the only people I knew who ran half marathons were my spin teachers, and it seemed absolutely insane. After seeing so many bloggers do it, it didn’t seem so unattainable, and here I am now, a half marathoner! Heck, I even ran 16 miles once! One year ago me would have thought that was impossible.

3. I realized that I’m semi-allergic to nuts. Or at least have a sensitivity to them and they cause my face to break out like crazy (or the newest thing-now they’re causing itchy rashes.) The irony is I ate peanut butter (only like a tablespoon) for the first time in many months the other day and now my skin is rebelling…ANYWAYS-this is kind of a big deal because if you read my blog way back when this was started, the amount of peanut butter I was eating was insane.

4. I got spin certified! This was something I’ve been really wanting to do for a while, but if it wasn’t for the blog world, I wouldn’t have had the courage to actually do it! This would have been so much of a better point if I actually had a job teaching already, but I can’t even THINK about that until after finals.

5. My outlook on life has changed. Blogging has made me so much more thankful for everything in my life, and I appreciate the little things so much more. I’ve always loved the holidays, but I never celebrated fall in the same way (or ate so much pumpkin…) Last year around the holidays I felt really homesick, but not at all this year. Maybe it’s because I’m older and have more friends, but I think it’s also because through my blog I can still celebrate.

6. My weight. This is definitely not something I discuss a lot here on the blog, but it’s definitely a change. I avoided the dreaded Freshman 15 in the fall through rowing and being too busy to eat any free goodies, but the stress of winter quarter and stress eating, then dropping a lot of weight while I was sick and gorging to put it back on plus some-and going a little crazy in spring quarter (I’m not talking alcohol calories, I’m talking giant yogurt bowl calories and late night snacks with friends calories), I wasn’t in the best place with my eating habits or body going into the summer. I’ve figured so much out since then, and am slowly getting back to where I want to be, but it’s definitely a process. I still haven’t totally figured out college eating-especially with all the free food and stress dead week offers-but I’m definitely in a better place and know I’ll get there eventually.

7. My training (aka my workouts) have changed drastically as well. When I was rowing, that was pretty much all I was doing. We did team weights and some running/spinning, but it wasn’t the same as hitting the weight room hard on my own, or going to my favorite spin classes-unless I wanted to wake up at 5am and add a spin class to my 2 hour erg workout (which I did once..never again). In general, I have to be training for something. I used to always be training for softball, then for rowing. Now-I guess it’s for running. I trained for 2 halfs (yay!), started Crossfit, and am now attempting to gain some speed for 5ks. I’m actually really, really enjoying 5k training. Running fast (ish) is fun! Plus it makes my feet much, much happier. I definitely still crave the long runs though! The thing about 5ks…I think I actually have the potential to be decently fast. I think if my training and my NUTRITION (heh heh) was on point, I would actually be able to go out there and race pretty competitively (i’m talking local 5ks, not collegiate championships). And it helps I’m still in an age group with relatively few runners…But I just don’t see myself ever being remotely fast in long distances like halfs.

Last year’s Santa Run 5k

8. I started Crossfit! It really is so much fun. I’ve always loved weight lifting so this is right up my alley. I really miss the people at my home box…only a week until I’m back there!

9. I just feel like mentally I’m in a much better place than I was last year. I’m not a freshman desperately trying to make friends, and although I’ve had a pretty heavy workout this quarter, I feel like I have my life together pretty well-something that when I was rowing was definitely not the case. Now I’m the person getting homework done days before it’s due (this does not apply to all my classes though…)

10. My fitness level has changed. Although only this weekend’s 5k will tell the tale…I was in really good shape last fall while rowing, I did actually lose quite a bit of strength though because I wasn’t lifting hardly at all. Mono completely killed any fitness I had ever gained-after not being able to even sit up in bed for weeks, EVERYTHING made my abs sore. I never really regained any of my running shape until I started training for my half though-since then plus Crossfit, my endurance has skyrocketed! I PRed my second half by 3 minutes, despite the course being much hillier. I think I would actually be in decent rowing shape as well-since I can’t mentally force myself to do another 6k test, I did a 3k test, and was right where I wanted to be without totally killing myself.

11. I have so many blog friends now! Though I haven’t met hardly any in real life, they really do mean a lot to me, and every single comment really does brighten my day and bring a smile to my face. I also feel so lucky to not have gotten any of those negative commenters. I really do love each and every one of you! I seriously do get so much joy out of blogging. I love interacting with all of you and I love following along on your lives!

#bloggerproblems

12. I am so much more confident than I was a year ago. I’m another year mature, sure. I drive myself around places and live as an independent adult. But I also feel like spewing my thoughts to a bunch of strangers on a daily basis has also helped this. Reading inspirational stories from so many beautiful and strong women has helped this. I’m confident in who I am as a person-sure my body isn’t 100% where I want it to be, but that doesn’t bother me-I know I’m getting stronger and will get there eventually, and for the most part I don’t stress about it. I think about how far I have come in the last year. I’m so much stronger than I was a year ago, physically and mentally. The experiences of the last year have shaped who I am today, and I couldn’t be happier, whether they were good or bad (like Mono-it stunk but made me stronger in the long run). And I couldn’t be more grateful to have you guys by my side. Here’s to next year!

One Year Ago

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